My voice reveal and the explainations about it (transgender thoughts)

Welll well well… Turns out my voice reveal didn’t went as i expected and soo here i’m explaining why i did it and the things around it.

A lot of people saw my story ~~~~~~ veterans, mods and even Jake.

Screenshot of the story here


It’s all started because i said in my Instagram story FOR FUN i will do a voice reveal if i lose the short movie contest because i thought i would win (at least be in the top 10…) but I didn’t won so yea… i had to do it… now people speculate if i’m a boy or a girl and try find my gender…

The questions are the following one.

Why i did this? Why this Instagram story went soo viral? Why i don’t reveal my gender?Who i’m i in reality?

Tons of questions that a lot of people asking and wondering about me.

First at all… I wasn’t supposed to do it… I just thought: Hey! What about saying this for fun ! (knowing that i would surely be in the top 10.)

Soo… the winners got announced… and yea… i said i would do it so i did… I could had not done it because as i wrote, i said this for fun.

Sooo i wasn’t forced to do so but i wanted to reveal my voice for fun.

Does i regret it ?
Kinda.

This story went way too viral and i didn’t expected this, over 45 persons saw it.

Now, as a reader you are probably saying…

“Wait… You sound like a boy but a bit like a girl… i’m soo confused…Are you a boy or a girl?”

I’ll be honest…

I am a boy.

Now you are surely wondering…

Why do you wear girls sets in game and why your profile picture is a girl?

Examples

image
image

“Is that for simp ? bruhhh i never expected this from you ! booooooo”

No.

The reason is quite simple…

I’ve had and still have time to times transgender thoughts.

When i was around 14 years old and became a teenager, i started to question myself and didn’t really knew who i wanted to become…
More the time was passing away, less i got answers and kept thinking about myself and what i want to become… I didn’t really felt mysef fine as a boy… i was like: I don’t feel that good as a boy… i thought like “What if i were a girl…?” “How my life would had been if i were one…”

Yea… maybe sounds idiot but i didn’t wanted to tell anyone about this. It’s was like… something i was thinking about randomly and wasn’t focusing about it a lot because i was busy with school stuff.
When i arrived at the lyceum around 15 years old, i thought about it again but same as before, it’s was something i wasn’t focusing a lot because it’s was kinda a random thought and beause of the lyceum, i had to focus more than before about my studies…

Studies was more important the time was passing and these transgender thought kept coming back like… : “What would change if i switch to a girl?” “How my family will react…?”

I have some sisters which i won’t reveal the name and the number but sure thing is that i have some…
They left the house because they became adults and found an house where to live… But they left some of their stuff at home, old school books etc etc… and never came to get it back…

One day, i found a box where there was clothes and some makeup things…

I decided to try it… and yea… this is something kinda cringy but i wanted to try wear the clothes and the makeup to see how this will looks like on me… And i liked it…

I ended doing this again for some moment like when it’s was late on a Friday, or Saturday, i was wearing the clothes and some makeup for some hours (like to 10pm until 1-2am) just to experience it and see how it’s feels to wear makeup and i liked to wear it, it’s was looking nice on me in my opinion.

At around 16yrs old, the last year of lyceum was appoching and i kept gettting these thoughts more and more… to a point that i made some depression (also because my parents was annoying me soo much) i wasn’t really stable mentally, and one day due to a violent argue with my parents (this was because they said i’m never helping them etc etc not about the trans thing) i ended break my devices. (Computer and phone).
Consider that this was in the middle of the quarantine (back to march 2020) so i had litteraly nothing to do except watching TV and did some depressions… and got the trans thoughts more and more, to a point that i was thinking about it all the day and sleeping…

I was thinking about getting straight hairs cuz i let them grow during the quarantine and i wasn’t really liking having short hairs… I won’t go into the details about this but basically this dosen’t happended and i’m still waiting for this… since 1 year and a half.

Time didn’t helped… I was getting more and more depressed because i was still waiting to get straight hairs because i really wanted to try but all i got was fake hopes and this was never happening.

Recently around Janurary i thought about something else that i wanted to try…

Nail paint / polish…

I started a internship at that period and it’s was a kinda boring one so i was getting the trans thoughts some times… randomly…

One day i was bored at my intern and my finger was itchy… so i scratched it and i randomly thought like… “Maybe my nails would looks better with some nail polish…”

I kept this thought stuck in my head for the whole day… Why i thought about this ? And also… why as a boy, i’m thinking about wearing nail polish ?.. like it’s something for girls… (not really but you know… it’s somehting that girls wear in general and boys don’t.)

Long short story, i managed to talk about this to one of my friends and my psycologist and the friend i talked to about it ended give me some… I tried and really loved it and enjoyed it.

Now… jumping to the present…

I use to sometimes wear nail polish and really love to wear it, it’s looks beautiful.

About my transgender thoughts… Well… i still get some times to times, i never managed to talk about these thoughts to anyone irl except to only 1-2 of my best friends… but yea… my parents don’t know about it…

Just hope my story won’t bring hate and toxicity, i just wanted to explain myself and the things around my voice reveal which wasn’t planned at all.


  • All inappropriate replies will be reported / flagged

{PS : If a moderator land on this post, well… You can delete it if you wanna, i just wanted to explain my situation…}


PS 2:
I’m a boy yes, but i’ll like if you can consider me as a girl, would be appreciated. Might will do the switch later, who knows. But yea… consider me as a girl please, thanks.

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Also, if anyone wanna to talk about this to me, feel free to do it, but i won’t reveal too personnal infos tho…

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Thank you for sharing this it is really brave of you to say this especially when you haven’t even told your parents.
I don’t know what your living conditions are or how your parents would react to this kind of stuff, but it is really important to find yourself and be comfortable with who you are,
so be who you are, I know these kinds of things are sometimes looked downupon and all that but all I’m saying is just live your life how you want to.

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Walp… when i told my parents first about the nail polish, they reacted kinda bad, saying this is for girls etc etc…

When they first saw this, they were really surprised… But the thing is tell them about my transgender thoughts is a other level wayyyy higher.

Thanks for the support.

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Very brave to be as open about this as you were. I hope it felt good to get that off your chest. I don’t think it’s “cringy” or “weird” to have these sort of exploratory thoughts. Especially around the age you said you really started having them since that’s around the time puberty starts to hit hard. I think a lot of people can relate to this as well. As we get older we discover ourselves and what we like more and more, and sometimes we have these predisposed ideas that these things we discover about ourselves are wrong. Or make us weird or unnatural. This isn’t the case at all. I think self discovery is a beautiful thing. I’m very sorry you’ve had to hold onto this for so long as if it were something bad.

Don’t ever feel ashamed of who you are. Do what makes you happy and forget anyone who tries to tell you otherwise.

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Welll yea… i kinda feel better after speading this out, well yea… i felt it’s something bad and i think it’s weird to think like this even after many people told me it’s normal… like i know people told me it’s normal but even tho i feel no…

Fell ashamed, well kinda… i just kinda regret this had to be revealed or i didn’t mention this way earlier cuz it’s been exactly 771 days i’m playing the game :

Proof

And i only say it now after playing for more than 2 years.

Soo… yea i kinda regret telling and making this post only now…

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When i was like 5 i used to wear nail polish for the smell(don’t judge me)

My mum stopped me when i started coating my hands with it

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How does one remove nail polish from their entire hand?

asking for a friend

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i guess with nail polish remover.

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It was not dry yet, so she wiped the wet parts off

She rubbed off the rest with some rubbing alcohol.
My dad has a video of me crying about it

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oof… well if it’s not completely dry, then use a tissue and it’s gonna be done.

Personnaly i use a nail polish remover to remove mine when it’s damaged or i had to go outside for something serious…
like it’s a liquid (smell kinda hard) but it’s very efficace if you use cottom…

(i use tissue personally cuz… well first i’m not sure if i have cottom for this and also cuz i only have tissues)

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I just liked the stronk smell from it

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oh… well lot of people say it’s smell soo bad but i personally don’t think it’s smell bad, like when i apply it, i open the window cuz once i didn’t and my parents were almost angry cuz it’s was smelling so bad.

I don’t really fell the smell tbh

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I’m weird

I like smell of petrol
I like smell of nail polish

I just find them oddly satisfying to smell

Or you could just say curiously interested

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This thread is going off-topic, lol.

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Well i kinda like it too… but you know… this have tons of toxics producs inside soo… you shoudn’t really breath this for a long time for your heathty

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It’s still about transgender thoughts… tbh

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I smell them go “ew that stinks”
Goes away

comes back a minute later

“I want to smell it again”

“ew that stinks”
repeat

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Dude, lol. Like I said, keep moving foward. Don’t get involved with the past and be happy with whom you are. Remember everyone is born for a good reason and very brave of you to post this online even acknowledging the risks and critism that may befold ahead. So just enjoy life the want you want to and remember, your family are the ones who will support you the most! Take care, my G. :smiley:

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Thanks a lot ; )

Reveal this online was the easier part…

I need to talk about this to my psycologist and or my parents but it’s been like 2 weeks i’m saying to myself i will do talk about it…

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